The Engagement

I’ve always been very good at planning events.  I don’t find it difficult to take the initiative to make the phone calls, reservations and even at times put money up front to lock in a hotel, campground or even a big ol’ barbecue.  For months I had the whole engagement planned out in my head.  I imagined the whole process going down flawlessly on a sunny Saturday afternoon with a gentle breeze to our sides and a huge smile on her face.  I even went as far as imagining the car ride home, her relentless giggles of excitement and repeated I love you’s.  I imagined going to the jewelry store before all of this and finding the perfect ring and without even seeing any others, I knew that this ring was the one.  I imagined tucking the ring into my pocket and taking deep breaths as I put on my acting face and let the days roll by until “The Day.”

When it all came down to it, nothing really happened that way at all.  But I can’t be upset at that, can I?  I mean, I am happy with how it went down and I know she is too.  It still just surprises me and befuddles me as to how instantaneous and spontaneous it was.  Everything that was planned was forgotten and I only had one thing on my mind.

The day began just like any other as I sat in my chair eating a bowl of MultiGrain Cheerios with Trot lying down by my feet.  I watched Sportscenter roll through the previous day’s sporting events as Kelly blow-dried her hair in the bathroom.  She came by, kissed me good bye and went on her way to work.  I finished up my cereal and hopped in the car and drove to work, just like usual.  I arrived at work, unloaded my Lenovo and checked my email, just like always.  Around 9am, people began to roll in by the dozens and just like normal, I started to get hungry again.  By the time 9:15am came, I found myself on several jeweler websites and I was scoping rings again, to see what was available.  It was at this point that I felt an urge to go to a store and look at rings. 

Surprisingly, this wasn’t the first time I got this urge.  I had the identical urge last week and even got the address of a local jeweler and drove there during work.  I couldn’t find the damned place and drove in a circle looking for anything, but found nothing.  I continued my way back to work and finished out the rest of the day.  This time, I was cruising in my car, and listening to Gimmy direct me to the Smith Haven Mall.  In no time at all I found myself arriving at my destination and rolling into a parking spot right up front.  As I got out of the car I began to notice the other patrons at the mall could pass as my Grandparents or even Great Grandparents.  As I entered the mall I saw a posting of the mall hours, 10am to 8pm.  I looked down at my watch and saw the little hand half way between 9 and 10 and the big hand just past the 6. 

Great.  Not only did I leave work without saying a word, but now I have to sit in this mall for nearly one half hour before the stores open.  I began walking slowly down the mall and hoped that it’d take me 20 minutes to find the store, sadly, I arrived at the store in 2 minutes.  The metal chain gates were lowered in front of the store and two ladies were inside filling out some paperwork.  I stood outside pacing back and forth watching the minutes tick by on my watch.  A lady inside the store asked if I was there to pick up or make a payment; I replied with my one word answer, “engagement.”  At that moment, the two ladies came to the front of the store and opened the gate, ushering me inside as the lights began to flicker on.  Behind me, the gates closed as the only lights in the store turning on were the lights above the engagement rings.

They led me over and we thumbed through some diamonds.  I told them exactly what I was looking for and they began to show me alternatives instead.  When I said round, they showed me octagonal.  When I said white gold they showed me platinum.  Thankfully, the two ladies weren’t focused as much on making a sale as they were on find the right ring.  One lady pulled out the round diamond in a Cathedral setting on 18K white gold.  The diamond was colorless and refracted light beautifully.  I made the purchase, shoved the ring and case into my pocket and started making the phone calls.

I spoke with so many people in such a short period of time and I don’t remember exactly who I spoke to.  I found myself driving towards Kelly’s father’s home when I knew I should’ve been back at work by now.  But this was more important and it had to be done.  I sat down with Kelly’s father at the breakfast bar, folding my hands in front of me as I stared at the counter-top.  I began speaking to him and I could start to see a smile growing on his face.  By the time I pulled the ring out his smile had grown tremendously and his eyes were lit with excitement.  He gave me his blessings and sent me on my way.

The time was 10:45am and my heart was absolutely pounding.  I rolled back into work and couldn’t even pretend to focus.  I spoke with some coworkers and let them know what was going on and they were all very excited.  They told me I could leave early if needed to get ready and without hesitation I took them up on that offer.  By the time I got home it was 12:30pm, and Kelly was slated to be home around 6:30pm.  6 hours needed to pass and every second grew longer.  I watched some TV, ate some lunch and played with Trot… 5 minutes had passed.  I began thinking about what I wanted to say, how I wanted to say it, the display, the clothing, everything. 

Just then I began saying, “Oh Lord, Oh Lord.  I need flowers…flowers?  Yes, flowers!  But where?  Where?  Flowers?  Get flowers.  Go.  Now.”

I drove down the street until I saw a garden center nearby.  I jumped out of the car, grabbed 4 dozen red roses and headed back home.  As I put the flowers in water I began saying, “Just flowers?  Should I do more?  Yes, more.  But what?  Candles?  She likes candles!  I’ll do candles.  Go.  Now.”

I hopped back in my car and drove to a craft store, I knew I’d be buying in bulk and wasn’t interested in scented candles to drive the senses wild.  I grabbed a hundred tea light candles and a couple boxes of scented red candles.  I grabbed a couple garden stands and some vases and headed back home.  I started to set everything up and even cut the flowers properly and arranged them with the baby’s breath.  I had the shell of everything set up and was pleased with my progress, the time was now 12:37pm. 

Not really, but that is what this felt like.  So I sat down and waited, and waited, and waited.  Time never moved so slowly before and I despised it for doing so.  I kept hoping Kelly would leave work early for some absurd reason so I could get to that moment; but I had no such luck this day.

A couple hours later I decided I could start to put the candles out, but knew that I shouldn’t light them quite yet.  I began placing the candles all over and tried to focus on a perfect design, but my hands trembled and my brain was useless.  It took me a good 40 minutes to set everything up, mainly because I kept changing the order of the candles and flowers until I couldn’t conceive a different layout.

Around 6pm I began lighting the candles.  I wanted to make sure that I had time to light all 100+ candles and didn’t want Kelly to arrive as things were in construction.  It took me about 20 minutes to light all of the candles as some of the wicks were buried into the wax and others just refused to be set on fire.  Finally, everything was lit and all I had to do was wait.

I called Kelly and found out she was only 10 minutes away.  The countdown began.  I couldn’t tell if my heart was beating faster and harder, or harder and slower.  All I know is that I felt my heart beating in my throat; and that was very weird.  I kept hunching over the door to look through the eye hole waiting for her blue Civic to pull into the parking spot.  I had a lighter in my hand and was battling the candles as I waited.  Everytime a candle blew out, I re-lit the candle.  I kept misplacing the ring case and setting down the lighter, then finding the lighter and setting down the ring case.  I couldn’t believe how silly I was being and clumsy at that. 

I remember staring through the eye-hole and seeing a blue car pull up, at this point my heart lost the ability to circulate blood through my body and I couldn’t breathe.  I watched her door open and followed her as she came around to the front door.  I jumped backwards, dropped to my knee and waited for her to open the door.

The ‘Blackberry’ Transformation

This is my first time blogging about something other than my life or something that’s going on in my head.  I like writing about my thoughts and all that jazz, but what I did today deserves to be thrown in the mix.  If you’re reading this and you’ve never read my blog, don’t expect other “techie” or useful entries; because all you’ll find are thoughts on anything and everything.  But hey, this could be a new beginning.

Recently, I decided to add the $15 unlimited data package to my PCS Vision Phone.  I wasn’t happy with just checking scores on My Yahoo! and Google can only put out so many mobile applications.  What I really wanted to do was to find a way to help make this phone even MORE of a communication device, outside of standard text messages and voice chats.  So I set out to find free applications and tools that would help me in this endeavor. 

Before any of this began, I had to find a replacement browser, as the browser on my phone took way too long to do everything.  A friend mentioned Opera Mini and how helpful it was for him and his phone.  The browser couldn’t override my current browser and is therefore accessed as a data application on my phone.  The Opera Mini browser opens 75% faster than my browser and makes, well… browsing so much more simple than the default version.  There are no limits on bookmarks, and moving forward and backwards is smoother and quicker (plus it’s easier on the eyes). 

Now on to the communication side of things.  Google Calendars is a great tool to begin with, but I wanted there to be a mobile only version of this tool that would give me the same reminders I get on my PC/Mac, and that wasn’t happening.  I jumped into the Settings page of Google Calendars and clicked on over to the Mobile Settings tab.  By filling out this simple form and verifying my phone, I am now able to receive daily text messages with my itinerary, and reminders of upcoming events.  The advantage to this is also buffed by the fact that a meeting request can be sent from Outlook and received in Gmail, so I am able to easily add in these “lunch meetings” to my GCalendar and get a reminder as needed.  To add to this, I added a filter on my text messages to move all of these reminders to my ‘GCal Events’ folder on my phone so that I could scroll through them easily without having to skip over the 500 text messages from my friends about their varying farts and floaters.

After having set this up, I realized that I have a lot of stuff in my Outlook Calendar, and I didn’t feel like forwarding them to my personal GCalendar.  I set out to find a tool that would do exactly what Google does, but in the Outlook realm.  Enter OMM, or Outlook Mobile Manager.  This tool is a bolt on from Microsoft themselves and it actually performs decently well.  After installing this tool, I simply entered my mobile information (you can refer to this page to find your service providers text message “email” format) and set up OMM to send me only the high priority emails (as text messages) and calendar reminders.  Now when I step away from my computer for lunch or for a quick afternoon workout, I can receive urgent notifications and text message reminders for upcoming meetings. 

And just like that, my little phone became a much cheaper and less time-consuming version of a Blackberry.  I’m not required to answer the phone or respond to emails like most corporate Blackberry owners are, and these tools give me the freedom to stay in touch on the personal and professional side without the burden of a required response and weekend phone calls to the boss.

The Grass is Always Greener

On the other side, is always where you want to be.  We set goals for ourselves and when we obtain those goals, we immediately set another without even enjoiing our current position.  For example, a couple could be together for 5+ years, and the second there is an engagement proposal, the two are off and running; planning the wedding and inviting guests.  What ever happened to relaxing and enjoiing the simple pleasure of calling your significant other your fiance? 

But that’s the way we operate in our world.  We are always looking forward and rarely looking down and around, and sometimes even behind us.  I saw an incredibly tasteful and uplifting movie last night as I was lying on my couch as our puppy sat curled up in his chair in front of the AC.  The movie was based on a true story and depicted a stage in a man’s life where he risked it all to get it all, for his family. 

Every single day was a struggle for this man, his wife and his 5-year old son.  They worked double shifts and traversed all of California in an attempt to sell a product that would yield an income to buy groceries and pay rent.  With each incoming disaster this father, this husband, this man adjusted to his scenario so that he could survive.  It was no longer about buying a home, or fixing a car, it was simply a story of survival.

The movie did a wonderful job of illustrating the unfettered love of a man for his family, and his willingness to be faithful to himself all the while. 

“Don’t ever let anyone tell you that you can’t do what you want to do.”

For this family hero, the grass was not greener on the other side.  The grass was green on his own lawn, he just needed to feed and care for the lawn – staying true to the goal even through the drought. In the end, the grass was greener than any grass you’d ever seen.  The moment this man saw his grass blooming in bright green, you couldn’t help but be thankful for everything you had.  You couldn’t help be look around and smile, and be proud of where you are and what you’ve done.  You couldn’t help but cry with joys of tears with this man as he raced to get his son.

I don’t want to be the person who is always looking for something else, and always trying to reach another plateau.  I want to be the person who kisses his wife every morning, hugs his child before school and talks his dog for a walk every evening.  I want to be the person who everyone says “hi” to at work, and the person who everyone seeks advice from, and the person who everyone wants to share a beer with.  I want to be all of these things, not just some of them; and so I hope that as I continue writing sporadically, I can write about my progress.